Vegan "Chopped Liver" or Some Other More Appealing Name

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First, let me start off by saying that I identify as Jewish in a strictly cultural manner of speaking. Though I spent an embarrassing number of years growing up going to Hebrew school, subsequently leading to my bat mitzvah, I haven't identified with the religious aspect of judaism since, well, pretty much that. I don't go to services, I don't keep the holidays, hell, I barely know when the holidays are. And yes, I went to Israel with Birthright, but there are very few times in life you're offered an all-expense paid trip to anywhere, so I took advantage. And I loved it. But that's another long-winded story for a later date.

So, as you could probably surmise, I don't keep Passover. For those of you who may not know, keeping Passover, especially as a vegetarian or vegan, means attempting to find a variety of things to spread on matzah for eight days. It's not fun. Side note: to all of you who are not Jewish who say "OMG, like, I love matzah so much", stay in your lane. Your don't even know.

That being said, my mom still keeps it, and being the cultural vegan Jewish foodie that I am, I like to experiment making fun things for her to spread on her matzah. This year, it was vegan chopped liver. Yes, you read that right, but hear me out. During Passover, the Whole Foods near my mom used to make amazing vegan chopped liver. It had mushrooms or crack or something in it. I would look forward to it every year, despite not keeping Passover, not liking mushrooms, never having had chicken chopped liver, and being completely nauseated by the idea of it all.

I'm sure you see where this is going, but my first year home for Passover in years, and they didn't freaking have it. The woman working at the deli treated my mom's and my inquiry as if we asked, I don't know, something far more disturbing than "where's the vegan chopped liver". Devastated (yes, devastated) I decided to try to recreate it at home, and, I must say, it came out pretty damn good. So, for all you folks who desperately need a vegan mushroom chopped liver for Passover this year, look no further, because I'm your girl.

Vegan "Chopped Liver" or Some Other More Appealing Name
1 tbsp olive oil
1 small white onion, chopped
1 pound mushroom of choice, sliced (I used shiitake)
1/2 cup toasted walnuts (or cashews if preferred)
Juice of half a lemon
Salt, pepper, and paprika, to taste.

Heat oil in large pan over medium heat, cook onions until brown. Add mushrooms and cook until brown and tender. 

After the onions and mushrooms are cooked, combine them with the rest of the ingredients in a food processor or high-powered blender until smooth. 

Serve at room temperature with veggies, matzah, or straight-up bread because you don't let Passover control your eating habits.